Here we go!

Welcome to my blog. I am excited to have a place to express myself, no matter what I want to express!

I am a law-gnome. Yeah...you heard right. A gnome who practices law and medicine. I am also a podiatrist (licensed in Hotta, Congo, Africa--people run around barefoot ALOT there--so many feet issues, lemme tell ya!!!). So, you could say I am a well-educated gnome. You would not have known that growing up.

My father was a cobbler; he didn't specialize in shoes for gnomes...although he should have, it is almost impossible to find shoes that fit, when you have a size 25 foot. Nothing is comfortable and so you always have blisters and now as I am older I have corns too. It sucks!

I am a personal injury attorney--Okay, Okay--I am licensed in Furkavnugen, Germany (It's where large tribes of gnomes live). Call me crazy! Cuz these people do a damn good job of making me f****ing nuts! So many delusional people walk into my office, pathologically having convinced themselves of their innocence or that something is really wrong with them, and YES...something is really wrong with them. At least I know my "issues", these people suffer from delusional thinking, although, there is the rare one who comes in and is really injured.

These people figure our justice system is so screwed up that eventually they will get off or at least walk away with a wheelbarrow full of cash. Anyways, thankfully, I am just a law clerk of sorts until I pass the bar here in Cal-i-for-NI-A.

I have one coming in this morning, he is a real case of stupidity. His girlfriend kicked him out of bed and supposedly he went to get up and she smacked him with a pillow, which knocked him off balance and into the corner of the nightstand. He is claiming he has permanent brain damage and has some fruit loop doctor to testify as his expert that he is truly injured. His girlfriend meanwhile is counter-suing....for emotional distress from worrying about his injury; it has caused her anxiety and to lose her job, because she could not focus. Um...yeah.

But these people come to RRJ for a reason....to give them a fighting chance to stay WIN!

I will write more later, I must prepare now for my first case.
Caio!